


Dream

by Sandkopf



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst, Blood, I'm really bad at tagging, M/M, old story, still have to get the hang of this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-23
Updated: 2015-06-23
Packaged: 2018-03-31 20:43:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3992215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sandkopf/pseuds/Sandkopf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Warlocks dreamed. But usually, they were foreshadowing rather than simple imagination.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Another old story of mine. Still moving the pieces I like most here. Second chapter is written and will be added in a few days, I guess. Hope you enjoy this one.

It was a beautiful Friday, a few white clouds dotted the bright sky and the wind breezed through the leaf. When Magnus Bane walked into the garden of the Institute he immediately spotted his boyfriend sitting all in black at a table between the green of the grass and trees. He was working on some documents, sorting papers and scribbling here and there, drinking from a cup in which Magnus suspected black coffee. Magnus was fascinated by the look his boyfriend appeared in. Every person Magnus introduced his boyfriend to and even his boyfriend himself thought that Alec was the most not outstanding person in the world. That besides Magnus he wouldn't be noticed for the warlock always caught the attention while the Shadowhunter comes in his dark sweater and jeans or in his black fighting gear.

But Magnus knew the truth. Of course, it was Alec getting the attention because he was the dark, shy-looking one loving the eye-catching, shining warlock. He attracted far more attention than he could think of.

Same situation was here. Dark as ever he sat in the colorful garden making him stand out more than any flamboyant and extraordinary butterfly coming by.

When he was only a few steps away, Alec didn't look up but kept his stern expression at his work, fine strands of his hair falling over his eyelids. Wanting to get some attention, Magnus loudly cleared his throat and Alec's head jerked up. Surprise was openly readable in his blue eyes.

"What . . . Magnus?"

"Obvious, I think." the warlock responded raising one eyebrow.

"What are you doing here?" Alec laid his pen down and stood up walking over to Magnus.

"I was bored." he said easily. And it was true. He tried to entertain himself for he knew his boyfriend couldn't join him today but everything he did, including reading a book, watching a movie, playing with his cat, cleaning his apartment (more or less) and taking a nap, bored him even more. So he decided to come over to the Institute where he knew his boyfriend was and wanted to steal him some time. 

"I told you I had work to do."

"I knooow." bending down for a kiss he hoped the Shadowhunter won't be angry with him. Though, as their lips touched Alec sighed and Magnus got the hint. "I'm really interrupting you, huh?"

"I need to get this done, Magnus." his face was regretful but firm which made Magnus clear they won't have a lovely, spontaneous date now. "You know I'd rather spend my time with you but as a full of age Shadowhunter I have my duties to which this paperwork counts." sitting back down at his chair he took some documents and started reading them.

For a short moment, Magnus considered the possibility of making a sudden wave of wind appear spreading all the papers over the whole garden. Then they could collect them all back together again and Magnus could accidentally catch the same paper Alec was just about to grab, their fingertips touching. That would cause a light chuckle from Alec and Magnus would use the chance to kiss his boyfriend making him forget about his work and make out instead.

However, he did also consider that it might worsen the situation. So he just snapped his fingers and let another chair appear, one that looked much more pompous than the one Alec was sitting on. He flung himself into it and stared at his boyfriend who started to smile.

"Will you just sit there and goggle at me?"

"Seeing you is better than not seeing you, even if I'm not allowed to talk to you. So, yes" Magnus explained matter-of-factly.

"You're distracting me." Alec said and the warlock could see how he forced himself to stay at his work. 

Smirking, he responded. "I know my pure presence is as magnificent as it can get. It distracts everyone."

"I believe it's your hair sparkling in the sun so much it blinds me."

"You don't even look at me."

"Never heard of the corner of a Shadowhunter's eye? It sees everything."

Magnus frowned. "You just made that up."

"Made I?" and now Alec grinned widely and looked at the man in front of him, his eyes lighting with mocking joy.

"You really should work at your jokes, sweetheart." Magnus decided.

"No, I really should work at these papers." Alec replied starting to write something on them again while Magnus let out a loud sigh.

 

Magnus's eyes fluttered open. He lay in his bed, hearing the even breath of his boyfriend beside him. The room was dark and warm.

Rolling over to the side, he checked the red glowing numbers of his digital clock. They showed 2:55 a.m. telling him he only slept for an hour. Making a sleepy sound of annoyance, he rolled over again and wrapped his arm tightly around Alec who was deeply asleep and hid his nose in Alec's neck, inhaling his scent. Closing his eyes, Magnus hoped he could go back to that nice dream he just had.

 

Hastily, Alec stripped Magnus's blue shirt off him, locking their lips back together as soon as possible. He touched the tanned skin with his cool fingers which let a prickling flood down Magnus's back. Magnus felt the blood rushing through him, his pulse sped up and moans escaped from his mouth. When Alec placed hot kisses at Magnus's neck wandering down his shoulder and chest, he threw his head back and groaned loudly. Alec really did know where he could make his boyfriend's legs melt. 

Alec was finally done with his paperwork although Magnus had honestly thought it would last forever for he watched him three hours reading stuff Magnus didn't understand. The sky was already dark and sparkled all over with stars. When Alec told him he was ready for any other activity as soon as the documents were brought to the library, Magnus had snapped his fingers making desk and chairs disappear to where they belonged and attacked his boyfriend in an instance with a hungry kiss. Surprise had caught Alec but he hadn't complained. Quite the opposite.

Now, they had sneaked into his room in the Institute wanting to spend their time as far away from every duty as possible. The warlock couldn't tell if someone had seen them because they had been so busy with kissing each other and walking at the same time that he couldn't pay much attention to anything else. Without falling they had somehow managed to reach Alec's room and were finally having their long awaited make out session.

They stumbled to Alec's bed, their lips never losing contact, and fell onto it, Alec on top of Magnus. Their breath came fast and hot; Magnus freed his boyfriend from his dark sweater and tossed it aside, pulling him down and making their bare chests touching. The warlock loved the feeling of Alec's scar and Rune decorated skin against his smooth one, the contrasts forming a perfection he had never imagined before. Both made lustful moans deep in their throats and when Alec slid his left hand under Magnus's leather pants Magnus cried out his lover's name. Again, he reminded himself to wear no skin tight jeans when he was around Alec provoking him to canoodle.

"I think this is the point where you have to soundproof the walls." Alec whispered smirking.

The next moment, Magnus snapped his fingers imprisoning every sound in the room and with another snap the door locked. Without a doubt, he knew it would make Alec much more comfortable. The slightest thought of being caught in this kind of situation wasn't any issue Magnus had but he knew his boyfriend had. Yet, Magnus had to agree that he hated to think about the possibility of Jace walking in. That would ruin even Magnus's mood.

Slowly and teasingly, Alec removed his hand from the pants, fumbling at its button instead. Meanwhile, Magnus tangled his ringed fingers into Alec's black hair, massaging his scalp and anxiously wanting to kiss him again.

When the Shadowhunter eventually unbuttoned it they heard Alec's name from outside the room. That was the tricky thing about Magnus's magic. He always made the walls only semi-soundproof. The sounds coming from inside couldn't leave the room but noises from outside were still audible. Same works for the locked door. Just in case.

His name was called again, this time more insistent. Magnus could hear it was Isabelle but when he recognized Alec not paying attention to it he decided to ignore it as well. They pressed their lips back together, their tongues meeting, circling and playing with each other. 

Additional to the calling, the door was now hit so hard that the warlock doubted it was actually a knocking.

"Alec! Alec, come immediately!" yelled Isabelle's voice "It's urgent!"

With a deep, peeved sigh, Alec stood up from the bed walking over to the door. Magnus watched him with his cat eyes and smiled at the appearance in which Alec opened the door. He was shirtless; his hair a mess, lips kiss-swollen and the face wore a healthy red. He looked like someone who was just about to have sex.

"I swear you if this isn't important I'm gonna hit someone." he hissed angrily but Izzy seemed not to be very impressed by this threat. 

"There's a demon attack in Central Park. We don't know the exact number we just know we should get rid of them. Right now! Is that important enough for you?" and with that she stalked of, her heals echoing through the Institute's halls.

"Damn it!" Alec cursed.

Magnus had propped up himself on his elbows, watching his boyfriend how he opened his wardrobe taking the black Shadowhunter gear out of it. Worry rose in him and he stood up from the bed. 

"Hunting?" he asked even when he knew the answer.

"Yeah." Alec responded.

"I'll come with you."

"No, Magnus." Alec said firmly.

"But…"

"Magnus, please." He turned his blue eyes to Magnus who had grabbed his shirt from the floor. "We had this conversation already. I don't want you to be at the battlefield."

Magnus felt oddly upset about being kept out of his boyfriend's business for he only wanted the best for him and, well, help him. But he also knew he was over reacting sometimes. Mostly, the demons weren't very dangerous and Alec came home with only some scratches but it still left an uneasy emotion in Magnus's stomach. He will worry as long as he gets a text from his boyfriend saying he was fine and coming home now. And Magnus hated to be worried all the time, there was just no way to change it. Even after three years of being a couple he hadn't got used to it so he was pretty sure never to reach this level. His boyfriend has to go hunting just like Magnus had to cast magic for his clients. He had to accept it.

Alec was called again, this time from Jace, and Alec shouted back he'd be there in a second. Pacing over to stand in front of Magnus he took his hands and hold them between their chests, their heart beat vibrating against their skin. They looked each other deep in the eyes when Alec slowly lifted his head to place a soft kiss on Magnus's lips. "Mizpah." he said under his breath and went off, his weapons clinking to his sides.

Magnus sat back down at the bed, watching after him with sad eyes, wishing him all the luck of the world.

 

Magnus heard something ringing.

It rang and rang and rang until Magnus realized it was his cell phone. He opened his eyes and after a short moment of disorientation he noticed he was lying in Alec's bed in the Institute, only without Alec. After rubbing his eyes, he searched for his phone which was playing some pop song in his trousers' pocket. Realizing it won't be Alec calling him because he had a different ring tone, the memory came back that he waited for his Shadowhunter boyfriend who was out slaughtering demons. Concerned and tired at the same time, he looked who was waking him up. The screen showed "Isabelle Lightwood".

"Yeah?" Magnus greeted lazily.

"Magnus." Izzy's voice sounded hysteric "You have to come. Immediately. It's bad. Alec, he…" with the last sentence the warlock shot up from the bed, his heart pounding hard against his ribcage. "What's with Alec?"

"We're in Central Park. We need your help!"

 

Panic grew in Magnus with every minute. He was racing down the streets to Central Park, cold air swirling around him and no moon visible. After the call from Isabelle, he hadn't lost a minute and went off, prepared for everything. Or so he convinced himself. Izzy had sounded so untypical, so scared, so mortified. Something awful must have happened and Magnus didn't want to picture what. Something happened to Alec. Knowing this was bad enough.

It didn't take long to find the Shadowhunters. When he spotted them his heart skipped a beat. Jace and Isabelle were kneeling beside Alec's bloodcovered body lying unmoving on the grass.

His pace sped up even more and when he arrived he fell on his knees looking horrified at Alec's pale face. It was dirty with mud and blood, eyes closed and his hair a tangled chaos. Carefully, he lightly ran his thumb over his cheek but he didn't stir.

"What happened?" Magnus asked, his voice shaking.

"He got hit by knife like claws or something. I can't tell what it was exactly."

"It seems poisonous." Jace said emotionlessly. When Magnus looked up at him he could see the fear in his face, fear and fault. But there was no time to question this right now. 

He ripped Alec's shirt open, revealing a big cut through his skin from which red blood poured out.

Magnus felt numb.

Swallowing, he held his hands over the wound, blue sparks appearing and starting to heal his boyfriend. He knew it was bad but he pushed the thought away hastily for he knew he could save him. He could save him. He could always save him.

Guilt filled the warlock, producing a big, fat knot in his throat. He should have come with them in the first place, shouldn't have stayed at the Institute. Why was Alec such an idiot not letting him come with them? Sure, he worried about Magnus when he fought, too, but wasn't it the same situation Magnus always found himself in? Afraid his boyfriend might get injured by a demon? Or worse?

After a few moments Alec started to cough blood, his eyes opening slowly, showing a dangerous red around the iris. Magnus looked at him and saw his face grimacing with pain.

"Alec?"

Coughing again, Alec made the most horrible sounds Magnus had ever heard in his long life. He felt like throwing up. 

"Shh, darling. It'll be fine. It'll be okay." Magnus said trying to sound calm but failed miserably.

"Ma…Magnus."

"Don't talk." the warlock forced himself to smile. His magic was still between them flickering in different colors but Magnus could feel how the poison rejected the healing coming from his fingers. He felt how is magic was neutralized. He felt that it was useless.

However, he didn't give up. Desperately, he filled the spell with more power putting everything in it he had. Yet, everything was not enough.

Terror filled Magnus.

He heard his heart in his ears like a hammer, sounding too loud to concentrate. His eyes weren't able to keep focus and his body started to shake badly.

He couldn't save Alec.

But this wasn't right. It couldn't be. His magic always worked.

Alec couldn't leave him now. He couldn't just die and disappear from Magnus's life. Why would death rip them apart now? Why should their time be shortened so much? Wasn't it enough to know that Alec had to leave him someday? Why was this day today? Today was too early. Too early to be left alone.

Adding even more power to his magic, Alec coughed again, groaning with pain.

"Magnus." He whispered a second time.

"It's okay, Alec. I'm taking care of you."

"Magnus, don't…"

"You have to be quite so I can heal you properly."

"It's too late…"

"NO!" Magnus screamed. Exhausted, the blue sparks disappeared into nowhere.

Frantically, he tried to bring them back, tried to keep on the useless healing, tried to rescue the person he loved. But no sparks appeared. 

Nothing happened at all.

He had never felt so helpless before. Where was his power? He was the High-Warlock of Brooklyn, damn it! He was supposed to be mighty, yet, he was not even able to cast a healing spell. A spell he had cast so often. 

"Magnus… Listen." Alec's voice was low, so low that Magnus almost couldn't make it out, and it was cracking. 

"NO!" Magnus cried again "Don't you dare say last words to me. Don't." tears filled up in his eyes. The world seemed to blur, to shatter. They were puzzle pieces fitting perfectly together but were now ripped violently apart. 

"I love you."

"Alec, please." Begging, he laid his arms around Alec and lifted his head to Magnus's chest, looking in his eyes. The strong blue had vanished from them, replaced by a strange gray making him look weak.

"You… you made me…complete… and…"

A tear ran down Magnus's cheek when he started to stroke his lover's hair gently.

"You let me… be the person I…I really am…" Alec's corner of the mouth rose, forming a little smile and making therefore a contradiction to the blood which escaped with every word. Magnus had always loved it when Alec smiled at him. It made his corners rise, too, knowing he was the only one who got this special little smile. It was neither shy nor self-conscious. It was just a true and honest statement of love. 

Though, this smile left him completely mournful. It wasn't anything he wanted right now. He just wanted his boyfriend to be okay, to be fine and healthy.

"I… I… tha…" but the rest of the sentence was never to be spoken. Alec's eyes closed and Magnus could feel how his body got heavy, the life just leaving him.

Magnus felt empty.

He didn't know what to do. 

Alec's words were burning in his ears, the coldness of his skin feeling painful to the touch and his head leaned limply against him. 

Faintly, he saw Jace in the corner of his eye moving closer and putting his hand on Alec's forehead, whispering "Ave atque vale…"

"NOOO!" Magnus interrupted with a cry, hugging Alec's dead body tightly. Tears poured down his face, loud sobs rushing through the night air.

The worst case had happened.

Alec had died and left Magnus behind in eternity.

 

With a cry Magnus woke up from his nightmare, sweating like he had run a race for hours. His eyes were widened in shock, staring at the dark ceiling. He tried to clear his mind, recollecting what just had happened.

Alec died?

No way!

Convincing himself it was just a dream, that everything was fine; he wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his icy hand.

Yes, everything was fine. He had just dreamed. There was nothing to fear about.

Taking a deep breath, he rolled over to hug his boyfriend, to feel his warm body against him, to calm himself down. But his arm landed nowhere.

Magnus's mind went blank.

The space beside him was empty.


	2. Chapter 2

Magnus knelt on the bed, his breath heavy and his heart pounding so hard he could feel it through his whole body. Alarmed, he stared with wide eyes at the empty place where Alec should be. The comforter there was tossed aside, the pillow crumpled. When Magnus moved his hands over the mattress, it felt warm to the touch. Warm enough to note someone had been lying there not long ago. Trying to order his thoughts, Magnus recollected what just had happened. He needed to calm himself down.  
Inhaling deeply, he remembered his dream.  
Alec worked on some papers, Magnus wanted to spent time with him but had to wait until the Shadowhunter was done. Then he woke up. It was late at night and he had cuddled with Alec. Yeah, three hours ago he had cuddled with his boyfriend.  
But now, he wasn’t here.  
Why wasn’t his boyfriend here?  
Hadn’t he only dreamed he was hunting? He couldn’t be hunting for real, could he?  
It was only a dream.  
Being a warlock meant that sometimes dreams could tell you the truth, or the future or your hidden desires and fears. But normally, they aren't this real. They are more blurry and shredded, like pieces of a broken mirror showing different moments, feelings and happenings, mostly in weird and hard to interpret symbols. They swirl around in disorder, getting sometimes clearer or disappear after a short second.  
Yet, this dream was too detailed and too vivid to be a fortune telling dream. Wasn't it?  
“Alec?” he shouted into the darkness. No answer.  
“ALEC?” he cried louder and jumped from the bed bursting the bedroom door open and called again his boyfriend’s name.  
Still, there was no answer.  
Only in his silver silk boxers, he fearfully ran into the bathroom, kitchen and living room, shouting again and again Alec's name, his voice getting louder and more hoarse with every time. Accidentally, he forced Chairman Meow, who was sleeping peacefully on the couch, out of his dreams and scared him off. But Magnus couldn't care less about his cat in this moment.  
Standing alone in his living room, he whispered “Where are you?”  
Silence surrounded him.  
Magnus stood still.  
Dawn was coming outside, the horizon like fire.  
What was going on?

The warlock got another idea and stepped to the closet near the front door, opening it. He had made free place in there for Alec's gear and weapons so he was always able to be ready to fight without having to go to the Institute first. He remembered how much his parents disliked the idea, keeping Shadowhunter weapons at a warlock's place but Alec was very grateful for the closet and put all his things in there anyway.  
To Magnus's horror, the black leather gear wasn't in there, neither was Alec's featherstaff and as far as he could tell a few seraph blades were missing as well.  
That Alec was called for battle happened so often, so very often that Magnus had stopped counting and every time Magnus was worrying for his boyfriend in a healthy way. He never got hysteric or tried to convince his boyfriend not to go for he knew it was not a topic they could discuss. He just wished him every war luck of the world and crossed his fingers that the demons were only some of the most stupid breed possible.  
But this feeling was new. Terribly new. Never had he feared so much for him. He felt like he was inwardly shaking, his stomach turning and his head hurting. When he wouldn't figure out soon where is boyfriend was or at least in which condition he was in he would definitively freak out. Freak out and destroy something.  
Or he would faint.  
Horrified, he breathed very fast.  
What should he do?

Then it hit him.  
Of course, his phone!  
He always got a text message when Alec was done hunting and came back now. How could he have forgotten about that?  
And dawn outside means the sun was rising and when the sun was rising demons disappear to wherever they had come from. And when demons disappear Shadowhunters have nothing to slay which means Alec was done working. Theoretically.  
Running back into his bedroom, he searched for the trousers he wore yesterday and should lay around on the floor somewhere. After what felt like hours, he found the right one, grabbed the phone out of one of its many pockets and stared at the screen.  
No message.  
Magnus didn't loose any more time. Sliding his phone open he pressed the 1, Alec's speed dial, and hoped the Shadowhunter would answer even when he hated to be called when he was obviously doing his duties. Alec always was beyond annoyed when his overprotecting boyfriend started to call him on a five-minutes basis that on one point in their relationship, he even had left the phone either at home or switched it off. This had caused a fight between the two where they had argued about the exaggerated worries of Magnus and the lack of understanding on Alec's side. Sometimes Magnus felt misunderstood by Alec and Alec can't imagine Magnus's feelings because for Alec, as being raised as one of the Nephilim, going hunting and risking your life was something completely ordinary. In the end, they had made the compromise that when Alec was done he would send a text message informing the warlock about his condition when Magnus would promise never to call him while he was doing his work. But Magnus didn't care about that right now. He just hoped so much to hear his boyfriend’s voice.  
To his terror, the warlock was told by an electronic voice that Alec wasn't available and that he should speak something on the mailbox or try again later. Later could be to late. Maybe know was even to late.  
Hastily, he tipped Isabelle's number but was again rejected.  
“FUCK!!!” he screamed.  
He tried one last attempt to get Jace on his phone but his phone was turned off.  
Faintly, his shaking knees gave in. Magnus sank to the ground leaning against his bed. He felt his heart pounding in his chest so hard and fast he thought it might break his ribcage into little pieces. Sitting there, completely alone, his eyes widened, his mouth parted  
“It can't be true.” he whispered to himself “It can't be true. It can't be true. It can't be true.”

Time seemed to pass slowly. The sun rose, flooding the room with light through the rainbow curtains. The ticking of his clock was maddening loud. The cold feeling warmth made the warlock shiver.  
“It can't be true.”  
Chairman Meow entered the room, padding over to his owner. But Magnus didn't move even when the cat brushed his head against Magnus's knee and climbed on it to lay in the warlock's lap.  
“It can't be true.”  
The traffic outside got louder, people chatting on the street on their way to work. He heard them laughing. Somewhere dogs were barking. Life seemed to go as usual.  
“It can't be true.”

Magnus's heart almost gave up from the shock as his phone buzzed in his hand. Hissing, the cat jumped from his lap and leaped under the bed as shocked as Magnus was. He stared at his phone in disbelieve, as if it had turned into a huge, hungry basilisk with sharp teeth wanting to eat his narrow fingers. His whole body was shaking and he was almost not able to rise the phone to read what it said on the screen.  
“New Message.”  
Frantically, he opened the message.  
“It can't be true.”  
The text was from Alec.  
“Hey, Magnus! Had to leave 'cause some minor demons were making trouble in Manhattan but we're done and we're going to the Institute now. I'll come over later today. Hope I haven't woken you up. Love you <3.”

Magnus read the message over and over again. Was this reality? Had he really just gotten a message from Alec? Was this message real? Could it be a fake? Could he have fallen asleep again and dreamed? Or was the whole thing just a dream?  
Still shaking, he managed to call Alec and pressed the phone to his ear, hurtfully. It beeped a few times, then it crackled and Alec's voice appeared at the other end. “Hello?”  
The relief flooding over Magnus was in no way ever describable. He breathed deeply, in and out, in and out. He felt heavy and light at the same time, hot and cold, sick and healthy.  
Everything around him faded out, only his feelings and Alec's voice was sensible for him. The shaking remained but he wasn't tense anymore. What he now felt was something between ease, disbelief and happiness.  
Delighted, he ran his hand trough his sweaty hair and tried still to get his breath to a normal pace again.  
“Hello, Magnus?” Alec asked, concerned.  
Somewhere out of Magnus's throat escaped a quite laughing yet trembling sound. He couldn't believe what was actually happening. It felt like years that he had heard that voice. It felt like so many horrible years of fear and dying hope.  
However, all this was forgotten. Nothing mattered. Only that Magnus knew that his boyfriend was alive. Alive and healthy.  
“Magnus? Are you okay? Magnus?” the phone still pressed to Magnus's ear send Alec's worry over to reach the warlock who now finally found words to say.  
“Yeah.” his voice was high, almost cracking “Yeah, I'm fine. I... I just wanted to hear your voice, sweetheart.”  
This didn't seem to convince the Shadowhunter and Magnus agreed to himself that he might sound completely freaked out.  
“Are you sure? You sound, well, petrified.”  
“It's quite alright, darling. Really. I'll see you later.”  
“Okay...”  
“Alec?”  
“Yeah?”  
Calmly, Magnus closed his eyes and smiled. “I love you.”  
“I love you, too.”  
With that, Magnus broke the connection. Chairman Meow had returned from under the bed and meowed confused. The warlock just sat there and stared at his screen which showed a sleeping face of his boyfriend. Sweet, innocent and beautiful.  
And alive.  
“It was not true.” Magnus breathed turning his head to face his cat “It was not true.”

After sitting silently on his floor for a while, Magnus eventually stood up and put some clothes on. He walked into the bathroom intending to wash his face but was quite shocked when he saw his reflection in the mirror. He looked like he hadn't slept for a month. His skin looked unusual pale and his hair was a sweaty mass, tangled at every end. Huge bags weighted under his reddened eyes, and just now Magnus realized that tears had wettened his face making him look miserable, helpless and sick.  
Never had Magnus thought that he would ever freak out like this again. And especially not because of a dream he had. There were times he looked worse but this feeling of never-ending fear caused by his very own imagination was something completely new for Magnus.  
With cold water, he washed his face feeling the color come back to his face. Leaning on the basin, he sighed deeply while the water dropped from his chin and nose. He was so outworn he was about to just go back to bed after having a shower when he suddenly heard keys in his front door making him jump. He looked himself in the baffled eyes when his name was called.  
“Magnus?”  
The warlock turned and headed to the front door where Alec was standing, apparently waiting for his boyfriend to show up. When the Shadowhunter saw Magnus his eyes widened and his jaw fell in shock.  
“Magnus!” he exclaimed “What happened?” but Magnus didn't really listen to what Alec said. He just stared at his Alec. As usual, he wore his black leather gear, dotted with mud and demon blood. His face looked clean, only a little scratch on the forehead. Quickly, Alec pulled the dirty featherstaff from his back, stepped out of his boots and let his jacket fall to the floor only to walk into the room without making it too dirty. Standing in front of Magnus, he cupped his cheek. Opening his mouth to say something, Alec was immediately cut off by his boyfriend. “Are you hurt?” he asked worriedly.  
This made Alec smile. “No, I'm not.”  
In disbelief, Magnus catched the hem of Alec's dark shirt and pulled it impatiently over his head. Ignoring the surprised and confused comments from his boyfriend, Magnus observed the scarred and Runed skin. With careful fingers, he traced over Alec's chest down his torso. No cut. Only old, already healed injuries. No Iratzes. Only old faded ones. There were a few bruises but they were usual marking his body. Nothing to worry about. Alec was in perfect condition for one who had just slaughtered creatures from another dimension. Absolutely nothing to worry about.  
“Then why are you here?” Magnus asked, his voice higher and more quite than he originally intended it to sound like.  
Startled, Alec locked his eyes with Magnus's.  
“Am I not allowed to come here anymore?” he said playfully, obviously trying to raise the mood.  
“Of... of course. But you said you go first to the Institute. I thought you'll come over later. You only come here immediately when you are badly hurt.”  
Kindly, Alec smiled at Magnus though his eyes were full of anxiety. Or was it anxiety? Usually, Magnus could read everything in this deep blue but now he couldn't interpret them very well. It was a look he had never seen his boyfriend wearing before. It was more than anxiety. Something between worry and terror and angst and horror. However, Magnus couldn't put his finger on it.  
“You sounded terrible at the phone.” Alec admitted softly. “I was worried something had happened. I thought you could need me. You know, to talk and to comfort you.”  
Magnus could only stare at Alec. Here his boyfriend stood, dirty and sweaty from hunting, clearly very tired but worried enough to let everything behind and come over. Magnus just realized how much not only he cared about Alec but how much Alec cared about him as well. That what it meant to find true love, right? Caring about each other on the same level and always be there when one is in need of some help or comfort without even asking. How long had it been that someone cared so much about Magnus?  
“You...” Magnus started still staring into Alec's blue orbs. Searching for words, he slowly opened his mouth and closed it again. How could he possibly put these feelings into words? How could he show him how much Alec meant to him. How could he make him understand?  
The Shadowhunter softly stroked Magnus's cheekbones and Magnus could see how his expression changed. A single tear had come again, slowly running down his cheek and caught by Alec's thumb. Thoughtfully, the Shadowhunter moved his hand from his lover's face, looking at his wet thumb and brushed it against his index finger, drying the tear away. Eyes rising to meet Magnus's again, Magnus couldn't resist the look of pure love in these oceans he called eyes.  
Instinctively, Magnus followed his body and slung his arms around Alec's bare shoulders and pulled him close. He pressed there chests together, their heartbeats meeting. Hiding his nose in the crook of Alec's neck, he inhaled his scent. Yes, he was sweaty and dirty but he still smelled like Alec. Finally, he could feel the closeness of his love, finally felt safe where he stood. Now, he could understand that it was only a dream, that he had a horrible nightmare where no part was true. He hadn't lost anything, no, it felt more like having got a stronger bond between them. They cared equally about each other and want to be with each other as close as possible.  
“Thank you.” Magnus whispered in Alec's ear, relieved he wasn't alone but in love with the greatest person alive.


End file.
